3 Ways the Holy Family will Help Your Family

Holy Family

According to St. John Paul II, “As the family goes, so goes the nation and so goes the whole world in which we live.” Families are a microcosm of society. The breakdown of the family unit is the greatest tragedy of our lifetime.

Living with other people is challenging.

Raising children is a full-time job. It’s an underappreciated and exhausting job. There is no parent manual. Too many unique circumstances exist for a clear-cut black and white rulebook. Right?!

While the details of parenthood can be debatable, there is a blueprint to raising a family with grace and love. This model is found by examining the Holy Family! Jesus. Mary. Joseph.

An analysis of Scripture and Traditional Catholic teaching will show us that the Holy Family’s love,  obedience to God’s will, humility, and patience give you an example of how to foster meaningful and lasting relationships with your friends, spouses, children, and neighbors.

Model for the Family

In his Angelus on December 31st, 2006, Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI declared, “The Holy Family of Nazareth is truly the “prototype” of every Christian family which, united in the Sacrament of Marriage and nourished by the Word and the Eucharist, is called to carry out the wonderful vocation and mission of being the living cell not only of society but also of the Church, a sign and instrument of unity for the entire human race.

Jesus displayed obedience to his parents. This truth is shown in the tradition of the Catholic Church. The opening Antiphon in the Divine Office for the Feast of the Holy Family is “Come let us worship Christ, the Son of God, who was obedient to Joseph and Mary.” Simple yet profound!

Imagine being God and still able to submit yourself to the authority of your father and mother.

Silence leads to sanctity

Guess how many words of St. Joseph did the Evangelists record in the Gospels? If you guessed a whopping ZERO than you are correct my friend! Though included in the key infancy and adolescent scenes of Jesus’ life the foster father of our Lord said nothing!

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The adage “actions speaks louder than words” applies more directly to St. Joseph than arguably any other person in history– as we can only analyze his actions. Cardinal Robert Sarah in The Power of Silence: Against the Dictatorship of Noise plainly stated, “Man must make a choice: God or nothing, silence or noise.” Using Sarah’s logic Joseph not only clearly, but overwhelmingly chose God!

Joseph’s ability to heed the Angel’s message to flee the wrath of King Herod demonstrates a complete trust and dependence on God. The noise of life yanks me in different directions– all away from God. Looking to the silent saint as a role model helps to remind me of the importance of asking the Lord for help.

St. Joseph provides the ideal for what it means to be a kind and loving father and man. More than ever this world needs strong men to be role models for their families and communities.

Humility overcomes Hubris

humility over pride

According to St. Louis de Montfort, “The Son of God became man for our salvation but only in Mary and through Mary.”  Mary is honored because of her humility and obedience to the will of God. Her YES to God’s plan was the pathway by which Jesus entered our world.

Like St. Joseph, Mary’s trust in God was evident in her obedience, despite the unique circumstances the Holy Family was in.

Conclusion

Due to Original Sin, humanity suffers a fractured relationship with God. The Mystery of the Incarnation involved God becoming man in the Person of Jesus Christ. Divine Love selected Joseph of Nazareth to be the legal and foster father of Jesus Christ and protector of Mary. Mary was chosen to be the mother of the Son of God.

St. John Paul II closed his Apostolic Exhortation Familiaris Consortio by saying, “I entrust each family to Him, to Mary, and to Joseph.”

May all men reflect upon the silent, humble, and diligent example of the Holy Family. Come Holy Spirit grant us opportunities to be holier versions of ourselves!

Related Resources

An Advent Reflection on Finding Gratitude in the Stressful Season

3 Titles of Mary that Give Me Hope

A Birthday Letter to the Infant Son of God

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3 Reasons Why Saint Joseph is the Best Role Model for Men

ron swanson be a man

On March 19 the Catholic Church celebrates the feast day of St. Joseph–foster father of Jesus. According to Richard E. Vatz, professor at Towson University, in The Washington Times (https://m.washingtontimes.com), “there is no root cause more consequential in producing permanent violence, poverty and related life dissatisfaction issues than fatherlessness.” St. Joseph provides the ideal for what it means to be a kind and loving father and man. More than ever this world needs strong men to be role models for their families and communities.

An analysis of Scripture and Traditional Catholic teaching will show us that St. Joseph’s silence, humility, and patience will equip men in the 2019 with the tools necessary to foster meaningful and lasting relationships with their friends, spouses, children, and neighbors.

Silence leads to sanctity

Guess how many words of St. Joseph did the Evangelists record in the Gospels? If you guessed a whopping ZERO than you are correct my friend! Though included in the key infancy and adolescent scenes of Jesus’ life the foster father of our Lord said nothing!

silence of St Joseph

The old adage “actions speaks louder than words” applies more directly to St. Joseph than arguably any other person in history– as we can only analyze his actions. Cardinal Robert Sarah in The Power of Silence: Against the Dictatorship of Noise plainly stated, “Man must make a choice: God or nothing, silence or noise.” Using Sarah’s logic Joseph not only clearly, but overwhelmingly choose God!

Joseph’s ability to heed the Angel’s message to flee the wrath of King Herod demonstrates a complete trust and dependence on God. The noise of life yanks me in different directions– all away from God. Looking to the silent saint as a role model helps to remind me of the importance of asking the Lord for help.

Humility overcomes Hubris

humility over pride

Hearing that you must play “second fiddle” naturally causes humans to react in various manners. Being the “B team” certainly just not connote a positive image in sports, politics, and work. Some people downplay the role of a foster, or step-parent. “I am not the real, or official dad” is a mantra that may go through a stepdad’s head—especially on hearing the news that children are a package deal with his so-to-be spouse.

The movie Stepdads comically portrays the real life challenges men have to face in modern mixed family units. Both my wife and I thoroughly enjoyed that movie, but not merely because of the comedy. Rather, its message rang true that mere biology does not suffice for parenthood, let alone fatherhood. Love is the hallmark of fatherhood.

True love involves the virtue of humility. According to Peter Kreeft, “Humility is not an exaggeratedly low opinion of yourself. Humility is self-forgetfulness.” St. Joseph accepted the responsibility of raising Jesus Christ as his own even though he and Mary never had sexual relations.

As a just man, Joseph obeyed God’s will and married Mary. St. Pope Paul VI in his homily for the Feast of St. Joseph in 1969 used the word humble six times in referring to the foster father of Jesus. More specifically, the recent canonized pontiff wrote, “Saint Joseph is the model of those humble ones that Christianity raises to great destinies, and he is the proof that in order to be good and genuine followers of Christ there is no need of ‘great things’; it is enough to have the common, simple, human virtues, but they need to be true and authentic (Emphasis added mine).” St. Joseph’s simple, humble, and hidden life act as a good model for fathers, and men in general, that avoiding the drama of sin is possible and worthwhile!

Model for Workers

Russian novelist Leo Tolstoy remarked, “The two most powerful warriors are patience and time.” Although St. Joseph’s lifespan may be up for debate, his levels of patience certainly could not be argued.  Being a carpenter by trade, I am most confident that Joseph was quite patient. I can barely do a house project without cursing let alone craft with wood.

Men typically associate themselves with the work that they do. “Where do you work?” is almost always the first question I am asked (and that one that I ask) when meeting a new guy either at the parish, neighborhood, or at work outings. St. Pope John Paul II articulates the value of work best in his Apostolic Exhortation Redemptoris Custos,

If the Family of Nazareth is an example and model for human families, in the order of salvation and holiness, so too, by analogy, is Jesus’ work at the side of Joseph the carpenter. In our own day, the Church has emphasized this by instituting the liturgical memorial of St. Joseph the Worker on May 1. Human work, and especially manual labor, receive special prominence in the Gospel. Along with the humanity of the Son of God, work too has been taken up in the mystery of the Incarnation, and has also been redeemed in a special way. At the workbench where he plied his trade together with Jesus, Joseph brought human work closer to the mystery of the Redemption (no 22, Emphasis added mine).

joseph the worker

Conclusion

Due to Original Sin, humanity suffered (still suffers) a fractured relationship with God. The Mystery of the Incarnation involved God becoming man in the Person of Jesus Christ. Divine Love selected Joseph of Nazareth to be the legal and foster father of Jesus Christ and protector of Mary. St. Paul VI declared, “Because of that function which he [Joseph] performed in regard to Christ during his childhood and youth, he has been declared Patron or Protector of the Church, which continues Christ’s image and mission in time and reflects them in history” (https://stjsa.org/paul-vi-and-saint-joseph). May all men reflect upon the silent, humble, and diligent example of St. Joseph the Worker, and Foster-father of Jesus and ask the Holy Spirit to be graced with opportunities to be holier versions of ourselves!

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Examples of a [Grand]Father

Early this week, my grandfather passed away at the age of 95. He left 11 children my grandmother in an abundance of Grandchildren, and even great grandchildren. It is with more sadness and joy that I write today. My family – and the world – lost a holy man. His passing provided me an opportunity to pause to reflect on my own life. Sometimes it is important to stop and assess our spiritual life. Reflecting on my own path of holiness I need to take stock of whether I am living as God intended of me. Am I the best possible husband my wife deserves? What virtues may I improve on to become the best version of myself for my children? How am I doing as a Catholic man in today’s world?

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Saint Joseph is the Standard upon which all fathers should be measured on their greatness. St Josemaria Escriva said this about the foster father of Jesus, “St. Joseph was an ordinary sort of man on whom God relied to do great things. He did exactly what the Lord wanted him to do, in each and every event that went to make up his life. ”  I am convinced my grandfather model his life after St. Joseph. As a farmer, husband, and father, himself my grandfather diligently and humbly worked to provide for his family and lived in obedience of God.

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Obviously, we become biased toward our family members and especially hold them in higher regard after their passage from this life into the next. However, I have evidence that my grandfather modeled his life after the greatest male saint of all–Joseph. Jesus told his disciples in Matthew 7:16-20,

Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing, but underneath are ravenous wolves.k16l By their fruits you will know them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? 17Just so, every good tree bears good fruit, and a rotten tree bears bad fruit. 18A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a rotten tree bear good fruit.19Every tree that does not bear good fruit will be cut down and thrown into the fire.20So by their fruits you will know them.

good tree

I see the holiness in my own father. I see my dad‘s humble witness to truth and to love for both my mother myself my siblings and the Catholic teaching. While my dad is a holy man in his own right, I believe his path towards holiness was forged in the days all his youth by my grandfather. I see loving examples of husbands and fathers in my uncles as well.

The example of a holy father figure carries a lot of weight. Its effects are tangible and stand the test of time.  “Nothing is so strong as gentlenessNothing is so gentle as real strength,” proclaimed Saint Francis de Sales. The gentle, patient, and humble example upon which my grandfather lived his life will not fade with his death. Instead, the legacy of strong father figures is continued in my father and uncles. Ultimately, I am faced with an important question: which kind of father do I want to exemplify to my own children? I hope to live up to the gold standard example of my grandfather’s [and St. Joseph’s] humble life. I continue ask God to give me grace to become the best version of myself on my pilgrim pursuit toward a joyous life!

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