Am I to be measured by my accomplishments? My wealth? My prestige? Is my self-worth determined by what I’m able to contribute to society or to my work? These are questions that linger in my mind today and haunt me throughout the afternoon. In my continuous pursuit of perfection, I end up at a crossroads: to continue today’s journey toward temporal and tangible success or to take the narrow and harrowing less traveled road as a child of God.
Every day we are presented with this choice to take the road that is glamorous in appealing or to slow down and reflect on your life. Am I pursuing perfection simply because of vainglory or am I seeking authentic perfection glorify God?
I cried out to God for help in the form of a friend today. He suggested to pray the litany of humility to combat this internal strife in on rest within my soul and heart. The best weapons to slay such false and insidious thoughts of self-doubt and scrupulosity include humility and thankfulness. Only when I step away from my stressful work situation that focuses on utilitarianism and productivity goals am I able to acquire perspective that life is more than monetary success. Count your blessings. Be humble to realize your limits and things outside your control. Recite the prayer of humility [see below]. I guarantee your self-doubts will be diminished—complete eradication of this disease may not be possible in this life, but relying on the power of the Holy Spirit in humility and in a spirit of gratitude will provide you fortitude for the daily battle.
O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Hear me.
From the desire of being esteemed,
Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being loved…
From the desire of being extolled …
From the desire of being honored …
From the desire of being praised …
From the desire of being preferred to others…
From the desire of being consulted …
From the desire of being approved …
From the fear of being humiliated …
From the fear of being despised…
From the fear of suffering rebukes …
From the fear of being calumniated …
From the fear of being forgotten …
From the fear of being ridiculed …
From the fear of being wronged …
From the fear of being suspected …
That others may be loved more than I,
Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be esteemed more than I …
That, in the opinion of the world,
others may increase and I may decrease …
That others may be chosen and I set aside …
That others may be praised and I unnoticed …
That others may be preferred to me in everything…
That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should…
