Editor’s Note: Post originally published on June 14, 2018.
Confusion, misunderstanding, strife, and conflict pervade our modern world. “Fake-news” recently become a moniker attached to popular United States media outlets. The human race seems to be more splintered and fractured now more than ever! Ancient Greek tragedian Sophocles declared this timeless truth, “Despair often breeds disease.” Viewing life from the singular optic of the self-perspective also leads to despair. I am most troubled and experienced hopelessness especially when my daily living is self-centered.
Loneliness is a Familiarity in Our World
Life can feel like a lonely journey.
According to the great Christian apologist C.S. Lewis, “Look for yourself, and you will find in the long run only hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay. But look for Christ, and you will find Him, and with Him everything else thrown in.” In high school I used to listen to Green Day when I ran for cross country practice. The song Boulevard of Broken Dreams had a catchy beat and was always on the top of my playlist. Not fully reflecting on the meaning of the lyrics, in hindsight the words hint at a forlornness that is sadly all too familiar in the modern world:
I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don’t know where it goes
But it’s home to me, and I walk alone
I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I’m the only one, and I walk alone
Despair Needs to be Slain Daily
Because of the incessant onslaught from our Adversary despair creeps into life each and every day. Satan wants you to give up. It’s important to remind yourself of how his frequent attacks. Being aware of our daily battle as humans and knowing our ultimate aim in this journey in life are excellent ways to help ward off despair.
Gratitude— A Shield Against Despair
Along with hope, being thankful daily is essential to combat devilish despair and pessimism. Saint Gianna Beretta Molla spoke of gratitude in this way, “The secret of happiness is to live moment by moment and to thank God for what He is sending us every day in His goodness.” The days where I experience greater peace, joy, and contentment are the same days where I make a point to be thankful for the simple blessings. As a Catholic my faith life centers on the Eucharist. A few years ago, I discovered that the word Eucharist comes from the Latin Eucharisiai which translates as thanksgiving. The Eucharist is “the source and summit of the Christian life (CCC 1324).
Tips to Battle Anxiety
Despair, worry, and anxiety sprung up on me suddenly several times this week. Usually it stems from hearing news that I perceived as bad, viewing it solely from my perspective, or possessing an entitled mindset. Giving myself a small five or ten minute break allowed me to reframe my mindset.
Reminding yourself to be thankful throughout the day is absolutely key to fending off despair and anguish. Martin Luther King Jr. declared, “We may have all come on different ships, but we’re in the same boat now.” Times where I am angry or frustrated with my children or wife usually is not indicative of their behavior. Rather, it is an indictment on my attitude of ingratitude for the blessings that God bestowed on my daily. As a father, I need to be more thankful—promoting this mentality will flow to the rest of my family and create a culture of love and compassion.
We all come from different backgrounds, past, and family make-ups, but holds humanity together is our ability to be thankful daily! Let us start anew and don a thankful attitude to combat despair and loneliness.
“Gratitude is the first sign of a thinking, rational creature. — Venerable Solanus Casey
Editor’s Note: Post originally published on June 20, 2017. A lot have happened since the writing of this post. My grandfather passed away in 2018. My wife gave birth to our youngest child later that year. But what continues to remain true is the importance of the Sacrament of Matrimony and that God is good all the time.
This summer my wife and I celebrate our seventh wedding anniversary! In honor of this event, I figured I would dedicate a post to our marriage. I also want to highlight the positive effects the sacrament of marriage has on society it’s vital to a salubrious society. Along with our own marriage celebration, I want to personally recognize my cousin’s testament to the married life. He got married to his bride this past weekend. I present 4 reasons why the sacrament instituted by God is necessary for a healthy society.
The four marks [i.e. defining characteristics] of the Catholic Church according to the Nicene Creed are one, holy, catholic, and apostolic. Each of those traits are found within the sacrament of marriage as well. I will highlight the qualities of the oneness [unity] and catholic [universality] within this sacrament. Men and women are different. Differences are not bad. True equality is not to reduce men and women to be the same in every single aspect of life. Rather, true equality is in reference to equality of respect and dignity for how spouses treat each other.
Unity in Diversity
From my own personal experiences, I look to my parent’s marriage as an example of unity found within a diverse relationship. My mother and father come from completely different backgrounds. My dad’s family lacks divorce and has long life spans. On the contrary, my mom’s family exhibited more turmoil as her dad passed away when she was only 12 years old and her sibling relationships are splintered. Men and women communicate differently. By embracing such diversity a unity may be found.
This diversity between a man and woman in the Mystery of the sacrament of marriage has been lost in our culture. Not everything in marriage needs reduction to sameness between the spouses. If that happens, a little bit of the Mystery may disappear.
I am meant to explore and learn about my wife on a daily basis. I am not meant to have her completely conform to my image or me to her image.
Diversity leads to unity.
To sum up this point I refer to the Catechism of the Catholic Church, “The love of the spouses requires, of its very nature, the unity and indissolubility of the spouses’ community of persons, which embraces their entire life: “so they are no longer two, but one flesh.”153 They “are called to grow continually in their communion through day-to-day fidelity to their marriage promise of total mutual self-giving.”154” (CCC 1644).
Full of Fruits
According to the words of Jesus in Luke 6:43-45,
A good tree does not bear rotten fruit, nor does a rotten tree bear good fruit. 44For every tree is known by its own fruit. For people do not pick figs from thornbushes, nor do they gather grapes from brambles. 45A good person out of the store of goodness in his heart produces good, but an evil person out of a store of evil produces evil; for from the fullness of the heart the mouth speaks.
The same may can be said about the sacrament of marriage. Before I continue, I do want to distinguish between different kinds of fruits: physical and spiritual fruits. I will highlight the spiritual fruits marriage offers society later on. For now, I want to focus on the fruit of children in the sacrament of marriage. The Catholic Church leaves the married couple the freedom to elect how many children they want to have. But it is important to note that openness to fertility is essential for an authentic Christian marriage. The Church states,“By its very nature the institution of marriage and married love is ordered to the procreation and education of the offspring and it is in them that it finds its crowning glory” (CCC 1652).
Children are a gift from God, not a product for married couples to control or purchase. I think a renewed sense of children as gifts would go miles to infuse society with a new mentality that is other-centered instead of self-centered. Admitting, I too sometimes struggle to make my children in my own image and control their daily activities. I more than anyone else needs to be reminded that God gifted me with children and I am to thank Him by raising them to be gifts for all of society as well!
Society grows through the family unit. Ultimate long-term success for society hinges on families that practice sacrificial love instead of self-love.
Use the Force
A certain power is found in permanency. Things that last long periods of time seem to gather a force and power as they age. The best example I think of is the sacrament of marriage. My grandparents recently celebrated 67 years of marriage earlier this month! You heard me: 67 years! Feeble knees, dimmed hearing, and other ailments that go with advanced years do not diminish the power and force my grandparent’s marriage hold.
Whenever I tell a random stranger, friend or co-worker the length of their marriage there is always a momentous pause…then a statement of awe and wonder will always follow. My grandparent’s marriage is not successful because they are amazing. It is successful because they rely on God to help them forgive each other.
My cousin’s new father-in-law gave pithy, but profound advise to the new married couple from this weekend, [after telling my cousin and his wife to sit close together] “See that little space between you. Always be sure to include the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit and have them fill that space. Everything else will work out, maybe not necessarily the way you think it will, but everything will work out!”
It is only through a sacramental marriage that married couples are about to use the force…the force of our Triune God!
Victory through Virtues
Authentic victory is to be achieved not through military might or political prowess, but rather through personal virtue. Having virtuous and charitable citizens are the only way for society to be renewed and remain healthy. While children are the more visible of the fruits of marriage, I maintain that the more universal fruit of sacramental marriages is virtue. Not every married couple is able to conceive a child. Such marriages are not to be held as less holy or effective as couple that has children. In fact, the number of children is not to be correlated with an increase [or decrease] in holiness.
My experience shows that the longer a couple stays married, the more they remind themselves marriage is a sacrament, the greater virtues they develop. Patience, kindness, gentleness, joy, and gratitude are some virtues I notice in my parents, grandparents, and my own marriage when embracing its sacred nature. Societies with citizens exhibiting virtues and charity tend to be more unified and healthy in my observation. Embracing marriage as a sacrament fosters positive qualities beneficial to society.
On a closing note, I want to make sure I am clear that people who participate in sacramental marriages are NOT better nor more holy than single people or priests. What I want to stress is that marriage along with being a sacrament [visible sign from God] is not a right, but a gift. Not everyone is called to be married! And that is okay. Diversity of vocations: married state, single state, and ordained state all contribute to a healthy and holy society!
😆😆😆🍫🍫🍫I don’t post many controversial things so when I do I want to make sure it’s on an important subject. 🙂😆Another way to think about it…it’s a gift to go to Church. We all need Jesus. ✝️ ♥️ 🙏Amen!!!😆😆😆 When playing catch turns catastrophic. ⚾ ☄️ God is waiting with open arms to forgive us. 🙏Last Office related Catholic meme this issue— I promise. 😆🙂🙏🎵🎶 Highway to Hell 🎵🎶Dude climbs a giant plant to see a real holy guy talk. Provides the holy guy a meal afterwards.Such a powerful image. 🙏🙏🙏Best to delete that snarky or snappy comment on social media. 🙏#lifegoals
That’s all I have this week. Stay tuned for next week’s Catholic Meme Monday. Receive updates straight to your email inbox by subscribing to The Simple Catholic blog.
P.S. If you prefer receiving quality Catholic humor in daily doses follow me on Instagram @thesimplecatholic.
Editor’s Note: Matthew Chicoine interviewed Allie Kintz via phone call on August 21st, 2023. Some of the questions have been rearranged and edited to provide the best reader experience without losing any integrity of the answers given.
Tell me a bit about yourself and your family.
I have two boys (5 and 8) and live in Central Oregon. I love teaching board games to family and friends. Our kids are in a local Catholic school. We live in a unique region of Oregon where there are lots of outdoor activities: snowboarding, hiking, and paddleboarding.
How did you develop a passion for playing board games?
When the rise of Settlers of Catan came about, my husband and I dove headfirst into board gaming as a hobby. We bought all the Catan variants. Then we went into more Euro-games, work-placement games and moved to Pandemic. During Covid we moved, and we spent more quality time playing board games. We expanded our collection to campaign style games. The games were fun, but the experience was different.
Our collection has grown exponentially in the past three years. Learning strategy and teaching games to people we found fun too.
How important is an easy to follow and clear rulebook?
Really, important. I have found video tutorials helpful too.
How many board games do you own?
At least 250 🙂
What are your favorite games of all-time?
Quacks of Quedlinburg; Space Base (similar mechanic to Catan); Arkham Horror Card Game; Three Sisters; Castles of Burgundy (Deluxe Version)
Describe your Catholic faith.
Cradle Catholic. Both my husband and I were raised by devout Catholic parents. After my husband and I got married, we were thinking about our value system: I went through several bible studies with other women. I heard God’s call and sensed his presence in the decision making. This experienced nudged me closer to trusting in God. Another mini-conversion – occurred when my mom passed away five years ago. We were present for her last rites. Witnessing the last rites, I felt God’s presence. The room was so spirit-filled that no one was afraid. It was a beautiful thing to be a part of.
Do you have a favorite saint(s)?
I love Saint Joseph (as a model for my boys and husband); Saint Therese of Liseux (her life is fascinating, to know in suffering there is a purpose).
Do you find parallels between playing board games and Catholicism?
I’ve been listening to the Catechism in a Year and learned there is a reason for things we do, and a structure for why we pray or believe what we believe. In board games, at the end of a game you take what you were given and the strategies you were given, and the result is good and beautiful (whether you won or lost). Our Catholic faith can be overwhelming just like a thick rulebook in board games. We are given so many wonderful tools to help us grow in the Lord and raise our children.
How do you pass on the faith to your children?
Helping them grow in appreciation for the Mass and the symbolism in the liturgy. Teaching them the why. Revisiting the importance of each major part of the Mass.
Making it a point to put our children through Catholic schools. Being surrounded by catechesis each day is important to us.
Encouraging our children to participate actively in what our church community provides. Giving back to our community and being actively involved. Our older son is currently altar serves.
Thanks for taking time today to chat with me about board games and our Catholic faith!
You too!
About Allie:
Allie Kintz | Board Game Mom Devout Catholic and tabletop gamer, Allie has been married to her husband Jason for 12 years. They live in Central Oregon with their two boys, ages 5 and 8. When she’s not gaming with friends and family, you can find her enjoying outdoor activities, cooking, and traveling!
My driving experience this morning. I wasn’t speeding at all. I even tried to slow down to avoid the birds.
Three geese just started flying over the road..
And one’s trajectory was lower.
I shared with one of my friends at work and he replied, “Find the message.”
I’m finding the humor in it. I couldn’t help smiling the rest of the drive. 😳😆🙂
The goose also reminded me of the words of Saint Paul…
“We know that all things work for good for those who love God,* who are called according to his purpose.” —Romans 8:28
Everything is connected. If you’re a fan of the TV show Manifest you will know exactly what I’m talking about. For those that haven’t seen it Romans 8:28 means that God can use anything for your good. Even the horrific and seeemingly unpurposely stuff you go through.
In 2014 my view on this verse was much different than it is today. On a November afternoon, I attended my wife’s pregnancy appointment because she was experiencing some pain. I heard my unborn son’s heartbeat on the ultrasound. A mere four hours later my wife miscarried. It was a horrifying experience. Beyond words. The best description for the pain I experience was numbing and like a snake bite. The poison didn’t set in immediately. Not until several months later did I come to grip with the emotions I felt. Losing a child made me question God’s goodness and I struggled to find good in anything.
The phrase “abandonment to Divine Providence” is still probably the most accurate description of how my faith life went. Dark night of the soul is another image I continue to reflect on in relation to my suffering that year. Yelling in anger and sadness at God was my default form of prayer in the months after the miscarriage.
But God truly does use everything for our good. Even the worst experiences. Grief is love that persists. It’s a tangible sign of what remains of your loved ones that passed away. Death sucks. But the more you experience death (spiritually or literally when you lose family and friends) the closer to get to the Crucified Christ. It’s a mystery of pain and love.
God can use anything for your good.
Going back to the Goose
Why did the goose dawdle in his aerial ascent? Why did I almost hit the bird with my vehicle? These are odd questions I still think about months after the incident.
God used the goose to grab my attention. My first reaction was laughter at the strangeness of the event. Moments after the “thud” of the goose against my windshield, I knew I wanted to write a longer article about this experience and what it took me.
I finally got around to finishing this post a couple months later. Everything is connected. God’s gives us signs and opportunities to learn in a variety of ways.
In case you were wondering… the bird is okay.
Take Flight, Let Your Soul Soar Towards God
How has God worked in your life?
How has your understanding of Romans 8:28 changed over time?
Take time to reflect on God’s workings in your life today!
P.S. Spread the Gospel news daily through your actions— even accidentally clipping a goose…use words if necessary. 🙂
Editor’s Note: Post originally publiched on February 20, 2019.
British author J.K. Rowling declared, “The wonderful thing about writing is that there is always a blank page waiting. The terrifying thing about writing is that there is always a blank page waiting.” Writers since the beginning of time faced the double-edged sword the joy of creation from words and the fear of writer’s block. Some days it seems that words cannot be typed quick enough as phrases, sentences, and paragraphs already exist in your mind. Other times crafting a mere word or phrase is as painful as getting a tooth pulled at the dentist!
Whether you currently are in a state of inspiration or at a standstill in your writing here are three tips to enhance the ability to write more naturally and effortlessly.
Read, Read, Read— Feed Your Mind
The great American author William Faulkner advocated for the importance of reading, “Read everything — trash, classics, good and bad, and see how they do it. Just like a carpenter who works as an apprentice and studies the master. Read! You’ll absorb it. Then write. If it is good, you’ll find out.”
I’ve found that reading a lot leads to effortless writing, without any strain. The mind needs a steady stream of information, like the body needs a balanced meal. Writing different genres is crucial for growth. I read comics for creativity and Catherine of Siena’s dialogues for spirituality and intellect.
Reflection
Another tip to develop more natural and effortless writing is to make time to reflection on the stuff you read. The Greek philosopher Aristotle purported, ““Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” Without proper time to examine yourself and the ideas that you read about it gets difficult to organize them into coherent thoughts. Among the best times for reflecting on a post that I want to write about occurs in the car. Using the minutes between drives to work, the grocery store, or other errands I ponder how I want to organize the essential points of an article that I am working on. Even a few minutes of reflection helps me write at a quicker rate and with less resistance!
Passion and Purpose
After feeding your mind with plenty of information and reflecting on the material that you want to write about the third tip I use to make my writing more effortless includes a passion and clear objective. Why are you writing? Is it for an increased amount of exposure and social media fame or is your reason deeper?
I created The Simple Catholic blog to find joy in life on my journey to Heaven. Flannery O’Connor said, “I write to discover what I know.” Through faith, I know that freedom from sin and death comes from following the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
My secondary goal is to help people find joy in this life and the next. Jesus said loving God and neighbors are the greatest commandments (Matthew 22:34-40). Prioritizing God, others, and myself brings joy to all aspects of life. This joy is meant to be shared with readers and passed on to friends and family.
Summing Up
Filling my mind with a variety of ideas, taking time to analyze that information, and remembering my original mission for becoming a writing has all contributed to helping me write more naturally, more honestly, and more effortlessly. I hope that these tips help you in your writing endeavors as well. Please feel free to share these tips to your family, friends, colleagues, and neighbors.
“All for one and one for all”—Alexander Dumas
“No one has ever become poor by giving.”—Anne Frank
“The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.”— Mahatma Gandhi
Editor’s Note: Post originally published on June 1, 2019.
According to the Catechism of the Catholic Church paragraph 675, “Before Christ’s second coming the Church must pass through a final trial that will shake the faith of many believers.” This Sunday Catholics across the world will celebrate the feast of the Ascension. Until recently, this high feast was celebrated on a Thursday—forty days after Easter. From a traditional standpoint normally a 10 day period existed from Ascension to the Coming of the Holy Spirit on Pentecost Sunday. Regardless, of the precise days, the main point is that for a brief period, the Apostles and early disciples of Jesus lived in a transition period from when Jesus no longer visibly existed in the similar manner that he did previously and the official descent of the Holy Spirit.
Suffering from a severe dryness in my spiritual life this Easter season got me thinking: maybe I am in a transitory period myself whereby the descent of the Holy Spirit is not apparent in my life. I feel completely dried up—spiritually! Obviously, my situation is not exactly the same as the 1st century Christians who had to live for an awkward [and maybe apathetic] period before the official reception of the Paraclete. Nevertheless, maybe your life is at a stage similar to that awkward week and a half—pondering the return of Christ, experiencing doubt in Divine Providence, or possibly even living in fear or distress. Reflecting on Acts 1-2 and wisdom from the tradition of the Church—through the Catechism and the saints—I came up with three methods [not really earth-shattering] to avoid awkwardness and apathy in your spiritual life in the days after the Ascension!
Drink from the Wellspring of Worship
The Eucharist is “the source and summit of the Christian life” (CCC 1324). I have probably cited this paragraph more than any other passage, yet it is vitally important to the Catholic faith. What sustained the Apostles in the early Church while waiting for the Paraclete? The body of and blood of Jesus Christ in the form of the Eucharist—it is the wellspring, the origin of worship!
Although Jesus’ physical existence did not appear the same after his Ascension, he is still present to the Apostles [and to us] body, blood, soul, and divinity in the sacrament of the Eucharist. St. Pope John Paul II mentioned the importance of this sacrament in his encyclical letter Ecclesia de Eucharistia, “Her [The Church] foundation and wellspring is the whole Triduum paschale, but this is as it were gathered up, foreshadowed and “concentrated’ forever in the gift of the Eucharist” (no. 5). During periods of spiritual dryness we may be able to sojourn to the spiritual oasis of the Mass.
Hail, Mary: Mother of Perpetual Help, Mother of Good Counsel
Josemaria Escriva declared, “Love our Lady. And she will obtain abundant grace to help you conquer in your daily struggle.” I imagine the days following Jesus’ Ascension was a perilous time for Peter and the rest of the Apostles. During the most confusing and perilous times in my life it appears that Jesus is not present—the most difficult days lands in the middle of the work week when I lack the time to attend daily Mass or ability to go to Eucharistic adoration. Here is where my devotion to Mary is key to sustaining me during the staleness of my spiritual life. Jesus augmented Mary’s motherhood in John 19:27 with a simple command, “Woman, behold your son!” This is a reciprocal relationship as a mere verse later Our Lord urged the Apostle John [who represented humanity both individually and collectively] with the charge: “Behold, your mother!”
From my own experience, I normally contact my mom first [when my wife is not available!] after an incredibly stressful and frustrating day. This is not to downplay the role of my father, but there is something unique, almost mysterious about the ability for mother to sooth children in need. The Blessed Virgin Mary is no different. Mother of Perpetual Help pray for us. Mother of Good Counsel pray for us.
Trust in the Holy Spirit
The great scientist Isaac Asimov once purported, “Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It’s the transition that’s troublesome.” While the first two points of his statement may be debatable, it is quite difficult to argue that turning points in life, no matter how large or small, pose a challenge for everyone. Transitioning from physically seeing the Resurrected Christ to the age of the Church would have been a tough transitory event as well!
Jesus prepared his followers of the coming of the Holy Spirit prior to his Passion, Death, and Resurrection. According to Christ in John 14:15-19, “If you love me, you will keep my commandments. 16 And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate* to be with you always, 17 the Spirit of truth, which the world cannot accept, because it neither sees nor knows it. But you know it, because it remains with you, and will be in you. 18 I will not leave you orphans; I will come to you. 19 In a little while the world will no longer see me, but you will see me, because I live and you will live.”
While the Holy Spirit did not formally descend upon the Apostles in the Upper Room until Pentecost Sunday, the power of the Holy Spirit allowed Jesus to be substantially present in the sacrament of the Eucharist. The Paraclete also guided Peter and the other Apostles in selecting a worthy replacement for Judas. Moreover, just before his Ascension Jesus repeated his promise to send another Helper to fortify his followers: “But you will receive power when the holy Spirit comes upon you,g and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, throughout Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth” (Acts 1:8).
Hope Always Never Despair
Although you may in a spiritual dry spell [if not now you most certainly will encounter aridity and acedia—spiritual sloth– sometime in your life!], please do not despair. Hope is always on the horizon. Through the sacrament of the Eucharist, guide of Mary, and promise of the help of the Holy Spirit we receive strength and sustenance make it past any awkward and apathetic period in our spiritual journey. Never give up—hope in the Lord always!
The virtue of hope responds to the aspiration to happiness which God has placed in the heart of every man; it takes up the hopes that inspire men’s activities and purifies them so as to order them to the Kingdom of heaven; it keeps man from discouragement; it sustains him during times of abandonment; it opens up his heart in expectation of eternal beatitude. Buoyed up by hope, he is preserved from selfishness and led to the happiness that flows from charity (CCC 1818).
