Writer’s block. This is the most feared word duo a writer could ever possibly encounter. Such a phrase represents an impasse. It shows a writer has reached a metaphorical brick wall that seems impossible to scale. Why am I telling you this? Well, simply put, I am suffering from a writer’s block of sorts. It started a couple days ago so let’s start from the beginning.
My wife and I recently got back from our five year wedding anniversary trip and I am coming back to reality from that brief recess from my fatherly duties. But now my “official full-time job” is up and running again and I am quite tired. My daughter Amelia, who is nearly 2 years old, has decided to revert her sleeping patterns back to that of a newborn. Literally, it has taken us at least an hour to put her to bed and she has woken up at least twice every night since we got back from vacation. So I am drained physically and mentally.
Sometimes, I tend to think that God may suffer from writer’s block as well–at least with the “writing of my story”. Lately, I feel that I have been a victim of divine writer’s block because things in my life right now are at a crossroads with little resolution in sight. To use a biblical example, I liken my situation to that of the Israelite’s time in wilderness. Just like God’s people in the book of Exodus who circled the desert many years in a seemingly dry and dull period of their lives with no purpose so too I find myself.
Perhaps God has grown tired of my storyline and cannot produce more character development. Who am I to judge his work? I am not the most charismatic person. I am not the funniest person. I am not even the smartest person. So what could God possibly want from me in this life?
Now I could stop with the above sentence and click publish and anticipate comments of piety to fill the shell of my current self-esteem. But I won’t. Because that is not the Catholic view of God. Jesus and the Church proclaim that each person is created with a specific purpose in this life and everyone is created with equal dignity. When I truly think about my vocation– I am not reducible to a job or even how many ribbons I have in my resume– I am first a Catholic, second a husband, and third a father.
In the process of typing this post I realized that I have over four hundred words written. Perhaps I did not suffer from writer’s block at all. I may have simply a period of dryness in my prayer life. And if I can overcome writer’s block most certainly the author of the universe can write a decent story with my character to impact others and draw them closer to Him.