Muffingate— Case Closed But Do Shenanigans Win Out?

After months on the run, the Muffin Miscreant finally was found by local authorities.

No one truly knows the amount of shenanigans the blue-eyed blueberry bandit committed. Detective Daddy estimated it could be upwards of 2020 tomfoolery incidents.

Witnesses claim the Muffin Miscreant expanded her shenanigan supply to include waterworks, toothpaste terror, and diaper-removal dances.

Because of the persistent pandemic the trial for the Muffin Miscreant had to be done mostly through online Zoom meetings. This added a time delay before her sentencing could occur.

Police tactics came under fire due to an national incident. Protesters gathered in the streets asking for reform in the justice system and to show more mercy towards perpetrators of shenanigans.

Social workers and teachers gave professional development sessions to the Chicoineville police department.

Detective Daddy learned about the importance of patience and understanding should another level 7 shenanigan event happen.

The Muffin Miscreant served a few months under house arrest but was able to cut her sentencing short through community service. She helped write a Christmas letter for a busy young family.

The new year began with much promise and hope. Shenanigan awareness will be a major discussion topic in city council meetings. But important questions remain:

❓How far will society go in making shenanigans seem normal?

❓Will Detective Daddy continue to serve as the premier local gumshoe? Or will he finally realize shenanigans may have beaten him?

❓Will the Muffin Miscreant stay away from muffins (and toothpaste too)?

❓Is this finally the end of the story dubbed “Muffingate”—a level 7 shenanigan event?

📍 Stay with PRNT TV 📺 to receive full coverage on future shenanigans.

📍Text “Muffingate story” to 55555 to receive a link to the entire Muffingate.

📍This has been I.M. Shocked with PRNT News reporting. Thank you for watching (reading)!

Thank you for sharing!

The Simple Catholic’s First Christmas Card

This is the inaugural Chicoine Christmas card.

Both my parents are too tired to chip in with input on the letter. And my three siblings are too busy acting like lemurs or black & white pandas to care about starting a new tradition.

Anyways, it’s up to me to present our family’s successes and 2020 highlights. Free of shenanigans.

Yeah right! Shenanigans are part of my middle names (unofficially).

Hope you enjoy the seasonal shenanigans!

January— New Year Same Routine

I started the new year as a fresh one year old. Noah, Amelia, and Josiah enjoyed going to school and playing in the snow. Mommy continued teaching special education at Valley Springs Elementary. Daddy worked overnights at a local grocery store.

My new year’s resolution was simple— add new shenanigans each month. Last year, I got caught stealing too many blueberry muffins (Pro-tip: Make sure to clean up the evidence before leaving the crime scene).

Daddy wrote about this incident and dubbed it Muffingate. Since then, I’ve acquired the nickname “Muffin Miscreant”.

February— Ground’s Day Month

Noah, Amelia, and Josiah enjoyed going to school and playing in the snow. Mommy continued teaching special education at Valley Springs Elementary. Daddy worked overnights at a local grocery store.

Yes, I know my family’s boring.

I think Noah was still in his Pokémon obsession and my parents were still watching Superhero shows on The CW.

I continued to watch how my siblings got in or avoided trouble and took notes.

March— The Ides are Turning

This seemed to be a turning point. Suddenly, Mommy, Noah, and Amelia stayed home more often. I heard mommy talking to weird kids on the computer. Daddy kept referring to himself as a “Zoom call goaltender”.

Josiah had school therapy at home and this involved him being a black & white panda all the time! Pandas? Seriously, that’s such a predictable move. Couldn’t he pretend to be a platypus or something cooler than a bamboo eater?

While my dreams of traversing the Australian outback didn’t happen, I did experience a “ground under” moment.

Mommy was on her 97th Zoom call and this gave me the perfect chance to try the legendary liquid—coffee. I found a K-cup in the pantry and gained a new moniker— The Coffee Culprit.

April— Sickness and Added Shenanigans

Daddy received a promotion at his local grocery store to Assistant Manager. He was even more excited when Mommy gave him an “Assistant to the Regional Manager” hoodie to celebrate the new job.

April felt like an entire lifetime (1.5 years).

Home school made Mommy and my siblings very tired and cranky. Even worse, Daddy got super sick with a virus-thingy. I couldn’t even see him for two weeks except on the computer. Josiah was really sad and kept saying “Daddy

in downstairs emergency room”. Mommy was stressed with teaching from home, taking care of us, and being Daddy’s doctor.

But this month did have good things: the Easter bunny visited us and Josiah learned to ride a bike.

I maintained my moniker as the Coffee Culprit by eating another K-cup.

May— More Zoom

The Zoom calls continued, and Daddy resumed his role as goaltender against my shenanigans. I miss the good old days when I could bust open bedroom doors without repercussions or being shushed. The strange kids didn’t seem so strange anymore. Mommy even gave up and let me say “hi” to my new friends.

Pro-tip: Persistence pays off.

Noah was obsessed with Star Wars and cars. Amelia (and Daddy) enjoyed pushing me in my throne on wheels. Mommy and Daddy got a new swing set for us to play in. I loved sliding and swinging!

June— Celebrating Sacraments and Sprinklers

Noah received his First Holy Communion on June 14th. It was supposed to be in April but it was delayed because of the virus-thingy or the panda-emic (not sure what to call it officially). “But God’s plan is more perfect than anything we can possibly imagine.” That was something Daddy kept saying. He seemed super-smiley and happy about Noah’s First Eucharist happening on The Feast of Corpus Christi.

Along with celebrating the sacrament my siblings and I played lots of times in the sprinkler. What wonderful waterworks! Josiah showed me how to play carwash in our water table. We play carwash often.

Mommy and Daddy celebrated their 10-year wedding anniversary! This was neat for me because grandma and grandpa got to watch me and the other kids overnight! We had so much fun.

July— Zoo Fun

The local zoo reopened with panda-emic precautions. Josiah called the gibbons “black and white pandas” and we all enjoyed watching the snow monkeys and ducks.

I set a family record by becoming the earliest to ride a strider bike. Strider bike didn’t seem right, so I called it “a butt”. Mommy and Daddy laughed. I think they’re proud of me. I say “a butt” so much.

August— Back to School

Noah started third grade and Amelia began first grade at Valley Springs. Josiah went to early childhood for the second year. I enjoyed more time to plan hijinks as daddy and mommy got more tired from getting house projects done. I continued to get my hands-on Mommy and Daddy’s coffee (I love coffee!).

Amelia learned how to read and created artwork daily. Josiah continued to play carwash in new and creative ways.

September— The Mystery of the Missing Toys

This month began normally with me playing with my dolls, cars, and other gadgets. But soon I noticed things disappearing. First, books I enjoyed were gone. Slowly my stuffed animal supply shrunk, and baby toys taken. I did notice more and more cardboard boxes.

Thankfully, I had Aunt Mary’s wedding to take my mind off the missing toy misery. I had fun playing with grandma, grandpa, and Uncle Steven.

Pro-Tip: Pushing doors open to go outside the reception is fun and an effective way to get my parents to chase me.

October— Mystery Solved

More and more boxes piled up in our living room, garage, basement, and kitchen. My siblings enjoyed many afternoons riding their bikes (and I riding my “a butt”).

I had a busy month with speech therapy starting and I broke my arm. Amelia was dancing with me and I thought a flying leap was a great idea. But the good thing is I got a cool pink cast.

I got used to life with limited toys. But then something changed! All the boxes moved. We played in a different room and slept in a different area. Mommy and Daddy called this our new house. We all thought it was pretty cool!

November— Shenanigans Supreme

My siblings and I love our new house. More room to run and climb. Noah had fun throwing the football in the garage with Daddy. Amelia found new places for art.

Josiah and I found a new way to play carwash. When Daddy was sleeping on the couch (from working a late night) my brother and I overflowed the kitchen sink. Water poured on the entire floor. We had TONS of cars to wash that morning! Daddy seemed surprised about all the water. After this incident we couldn’t sneak and do carwash anymore. Still not sure why?

Mommy continued to balance her teaching job with her additional virus-things protocols. She seemed tired most days, so I try to cheer her up with hugs!

December— Enter the Boss Level

Daddy kept making Jumanji references throughout the year. Everyone was talking about an election thingy. What more did 2020 have in store?

This year they say was tough, but in my experience all life can be challenging but fun too. I’m going to turn two on December 29th. I felt I gained a lot of wisdom this year.

Noah taught me countless facts about Harry Potter and read books to me. Amelia taught me how to draw and be creative. Josiah taught me how to laugh and play with cars. Mommy taught me how to love and hug. Daddy taught me the importance of a balance between seriousness and shenanigans.

Hope you have a Merry Christmas and a blessed 2021!

P.S. Daddy thinks he’s a creative writer, but he gets all his best ideas from my shenanigans. Follow #Muffingate for more funny stories

P.P.S. Special thanks to Daddy for being my secretary for this Christmas Letter. Extra special thanks to my brothers and sister for all this great content

Love,

Avila: The Muffin Miscreant, Coffee Culprit, and who knows what else.

Thank you for sharing!

First Family Christmas Card Commission

I’m commissioned to write my family’s inaugural Christmas card.

Pray I have inspiration to think up of something before next week’s deadline.

I did receive a message from my future self that the words: platypus, shenanigans, inaugural, and wherewithal must be included in it.

P. S. If you’re wondering about the time travel don’t question it. It is 2020 after all.

P.P.S. I won’t talk about the “successes” of my perfect life because my life ain’t perfect. I’m limping to the finish line of 2020. But I will be jovial and honest about my year.

P.P.P.S. Do you write family Christmas cards? Why or why not?

Awkward Family Christmas card meme
Thank you for sharing!

Use Imagination to Relate to Your Children Better

Tolkien quote about imagination

💡Dadhack #123—Think like a child to relate better to your children

Someone made a comment to me that everything is rainbows and unicorns to me.

Initially, it upset me. But after thinking about it I realized he was right.

The young don’t have a monopoly on imagination.

Thank God for it because reading only the news or talking about serious stuff makes me curmudgeony.

Amelia had trouble sleeping because of her brother making noise (she had a long week at school)

I hugged her tight and told her,

“Tonight you’re a caterpillar. I’m wrapping you tight into a cocoon. Tomorrow you will be able to fly like a butterfly. Maybe we will see a butterfly and say, ‘Is that Amelia?'”

🦋 She gave a sheepish grin and a tired laugh.

I could have easily got frustrated (it’s been a long week and I have failed in similar situations in the past).

🌈 But I think the Holy Spirit gave me patience and the ability to summon up silliness (who doesn’t like butterflies or find them calming?) to help her calm down.

Imagination isn’t merely child’s play or silliness. It’s living life open to the possibility of a higher reality—a world where anything is possible.

Unicorns rhinos

I did end up replying to that comment 👇

🦏🦄I do believe in real unicorns (rhinoceroses).

😊😂😆

How does imagination help you as a parent?

Thank you for sharing!

Why Teaching Your Children to Do the Chores will Save Your Sanity

Dad hack #4— Train the kids early to help clean 🧼 🧽 around the house (it gives me time to post more #dadhacks 🙂)

Avila and a broom

The Muffin Miscreant doing community service to atone for her shenanigans.

This summer my wife and I taught our kids how to:

🧺 Fold the laundry

🗑 Take out the garbage

🧽 Load the dishwasher

😜 Battle the shenanigans of their 18 month old sister

It took a lot of time, patience, modeling good behaviors, and reteaching but I’m glad we did.

Teaching kids chores result in:

Teamwork

Learning a mop was not something you hit your brother in the head with (my daughter may or may not have done this)

 More gratitude

Instill a good work ethic

Play/work balance

How did chores play a role in your childhood and later professional work?

What was your favorite chore (mine was drying the dishes— my brother and I usually made my sister wash 🙂)?

Thank you for sharing!

The Joy of Recovery and the Fist pump

I have randomly been fist pumping the air as a sign of thanks and triumph for each passing moment where I don’t have a fever.

This is not a victory for me. I just happened to get better. This is a victory for my family and friends. You surrounded me to give me support during my weakness.

I will not stop fighting because I am better. This was a short hiccup in my journey.

1️⃣ I will continue spreading awareness of the benefits of social distancing.

2️⃣ I will continue spreading the Good News of the Gospel.

3️⃣ I will continue to be an autism advocate.

I maybe look silly pumping my fist in the air to myself. I am sure God is finding it humorous too.

But I am also sure He wants me back on the fight.

This world is not about me. It never was and never will be. The only mission that matters is love.

Love God first. Others second. And myself last.

Thank you for sharing!

3 Reasons Why Jesus was Baptized

In 2019, Bishop Joseph Tobin tweeted a questionable statement about Jesus’ Baptism,

“Christ stood with all of us sinners seeking redemption” and that “the sinless Redeemer was reborn in grace”.

Whether his intention was heretical or if it was simply loose and careless theology could certainly be up for debate, I wish to write to clarify the reasons for why Jesus was actually Baptized.

Jesus' Baptism

Did Jesus Require Baptism?

Contrary to the cardinal’s statement,  Jesus did not require Baptism for salvation. Christ also did not need to be “reborn in grace”.  Jesus entered the waters of the Jordan as an example for his disciples to follow.

In John 3:5 Jesus taught Nicodemus [and later us] of the necessity for Baptism when he declared, “Amen, amen, I say to you, no one can see the kingdom of God without being born from above.” The Catechism of the Catholic Church recognizes the importance of this passage as well:

 Baptism is the sacrament of faith. But faith needs the community of believers. It is only within the faith of the Church that each of the faithful can believe. The faith required for Baptism is not a perfect and mature faith, but a beginning that is called to develop. The catechumen or the godparent is asked: “What do you ask of God’s Church?” The response is: “Faith!” (No. 1253).

Along with modeling the importance of Baptism, though Jesus himself did not require cleansing from sin, three additional lessons may be learned from the Event of the Baptism of Our Lord.

Fulfillment of Old Testament

Noah's Ark Baptism

Several key events in the Bible relate to water. Here are a few examples of Baptismal events foreshadowed in the Old Testament:

  • The Great Flood in Genesis 6-8
  • Moses leading the Israelites across the Red Sea
  • Joshua Crossing the Jordan River into the Promised Land

The Catechism of the Catholic Church says,

Christians therefore read the Old Testament in the light of Christ crucified and risen. Such typological reading discloses the inexhaustible content of the Old Testament; but it must not make us forget that the Old Testament retains its own intrinsic value as Revelation reaffirmed by our Lord himself. Besides, the New Testament has to be read in the light of the Old. Early Christian catechesis made constant use of the Old Testament. As an old saying put it, the New Testament lies hidden in the Old and the Old Testament is unveiled in the New (CCC 129).

The Baptism of Jesus is a feast to help us realize the fulfillment of God’s promises from long ago.

Prefiguring the Death of Jesus

Jesus’ Baptism foreshadowed his Death on the Cross. Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI describes this perfectly in his work Jesus of Nazareth,

Looking at the events (of Christ’s baptism) in light of the Cross and Resurrection, the Christian people realized what happened: Jesus loaded the burden of all mankind’s guilt upon his shoulders; he bore it down into the depths of the Jordan. He inaugurated his public activity by stepping into the place of sinners. His inaugural gesture is an anticipation of the Cross. He is, as it were, the true Jonah who said to the crew of the ship, ”Take me and throw me into the sea” (Jon. 1:12) . . . The baptism is an acceptance of death for the sins of humanity, and the voice that calls out “This is my beloved Son” over the baptismal waters is an anticipatory reference to the Resurrection. This also explains why, in his own discourses, Jesus uses the word
“baptism” to refer to his death (18).

Death to sin [original] gives way to a new life in the sacrament of Baptism. A new life of grace occurs through the waters of Baptism.

Door Way to Adoption

According to my favorite reference book– the thesaurus, synonyms for adoption include the following: acceptance, confirmation, ratification, and support. While each of those words convey a strong and position sense of adoption the synonym that stood out most to me was embracing.

Adopted Children of God

Biological birth occurs through the profound act of sex. Unfortunately, not every child is welcomed as a gift. Sometimes unplanned pregnancies occur. Tensions arise. But people who desire adoption more often want to be parents. In the adaption process, parents actively seek out their soon-to-be children.

The Catholic Church teaches in the Catechism in paragraph 1265, “Baptism not only purifies from all sins, but also makes the neophyte “a new creature,” an adopted son of God, who has become a “partaker of the divine nature,” member of Christ and co-heir with him, and a temple of the Holy Spirit.”

Enter New Life

Original sin tarnished the biology of humanity. Humans naturally seek their own will over the Will of the Father. Through the waters of Baptism original sin is destroyed. One enters into sacramental life of the Church.

Baptism of Jesus

Jesus didn’t require rebirth into the sacramental life of grace. John baptized Christ in fulfillment of the Old Testament. Christ’s baptism also prefigured his Death and Resurrection. He modeled the sacramental life in allowing himself to be baptized. German Catholic philosopher Josef Piper declared, “Adoption is the visible Gospel.” The graces received via Baptism bring new life. Baptized Christians become adopted children of God!


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Related Links

Remember Your Baptism

Why Jesus was Baptized

Why Catholics Must Have Bible A.D.D Part 6- Destructive Waters

The Sacrament of Baptism: Gateway to New Life

US Cardinal, Jesus Was “Reborn in Grace” – What?

 

Thank you for sharing!